1/22/15 – A Day I’ll Never Forget
2 years have gone by since my MS diagnosis. I remember the day as if it were yesterday. My heart sank when I learned the news and I felt as if I couldn’t breathe. Even writing about it now makes me feel anxious, scared and numb all over again.
I only wish I knew then what I do now, but I am proud to look back at the pledge I made to myself and to know that I’ve kept my promise. This was the hardest thing I’ve ever written but I needed to do it. It helped me accept my position, determine next steps and commit publically that I wouldn’t let my newfound diagnosis overcome me. It’s held me accountable every day since and I hope it will continue to indefinitely.
My Pledge
Written on January 31, 2015, less than 2 weeks after my diagnosis
“On January 18, I lost the vision in my right eye. Without rhyme or reason, it was gone. After days of doctor visits and eye tests, the diagnosis was unclear. But, when I woke up with a tingly sensation in my body a few days later, it was obvious that an MRI was necessary. Hours later, I was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis, an incurable neurological disease resulting in various automatic, visual, motor and sensory problems.
I was terrified. As a healthy and active 29 year old, I couldn’t understand how this happened. After learning more about this disease, I immediately knew that unlike most aspects of my life, I had no control over what power MS would have over me. I couldn’t predict how else it would affect my body and to what extent over time since each person’s symptoms differ. So, with the help of my unbelievable family and husband, I decided take charge of the things I could control – researched the best doctors, checked into Northwestern to receive the immediate care I needed and started working one day at a time to develop a treatment plan.
As I begin to embark on what’s next, I want to declare to myself and those around me that I will not hide behind this disease – otherwise it has won. Like any obstacle life throws, I pledge to face the challenges ahead with determination, adaptability and a positive attitude. With certainty, the life I once knew has changed but I am confident that with the help of my doctors and incredible support system, I’m capable of living the life I’ve always dreamed of. This will simply be part of my story.”
Anonymous
January 22, 2017 at 10:44 pm
Beautifully written
Zina
January 22, 2017 at 10:50 pm
Beautifully written. When I was first diagnosed a year ago, I read a phrase by someone who also has MS. He said,”if you give MS an inch, it will park a car there.” I try to always remember to live my life with what God has for me and not allow MS to dictate. Blessing to you, and as always, thank you for your blog.
wellandstrongwithms
January 25, 2017 at 9:20 pm
Such an inspiring quote.. it’s easy to forget that if you don’t give it control, you can control MS! Very motivational. So happy you found my blog. Thank you for your comments and pls continue to chime in 😉
Julie
January 25, 2017 at 5:19 pm
“As a healthy and active 29 year old, I couldn’t understand how this happened. After learning more about this disease, I immediately knew that unlike most aspects of my life, I had no control over what power MS would have over me. ”
This. This is everything to me.
1/3/2017 is the day I will never forget. I was just diagnosed with MS 22 days ago. I’m too am a healthy and active 29 year old, and was also completely blindsided by what I learned a mere three weeks ago. I know I’ve got a lot of learning and ahead of me, and a long journey to boot. But, I refuse to be anything but positive and optimistic throughout it all. And your post helps me reaffirm that to myself.
Thanks for your courage in sharing your story.
wellandstrongwithms
January 25, 2017 at 8:18 pm
Julie, I can only imagine what you’re going through.. this is such a scary time but I promise things will only get easier. If it would be helpful, I’d be happy to chat with you.. give you any insight, or information that could be useful.. or simply listen. I know it’s so hard to digest but you’ll figure it out in time, and you will fine your new normal just as I have.. let me know if talking would be helpful.. wellandstrongwithms@gmail.com. Happy to!